题目：茫然

实习结束后，很多人都问了一个同样的问题：那毕业出来想做什么？

老实说，我自己也不知道。

总觉得距离毕业的日子还有一年的时间，所以也没有真正去考虑。可是，现在想想，应该是时候为自己的将来打算了。

怎么办呢？

很矛盾哦，不想继续呆在那么遥远的学校念书，却迟迟不想踏入社会工作。有时候，兴趣太多未必是一件好事。这里懂一点，那里懂一点，但是全部都是皮毛。

其实还蛮为一些身旁的好友感到高兴。

一个找到了自己喜欢的工作，不管多么忙碌，多么的累，他没有一句怨言，只因为他做了他喜欢的事情。

另一个，本来就不能在一个地方停留得太久，可是却因为对这份工作的热忱，坚持着自己的岗位。不管有多难熬，不管有多么复杂的时间需要摆平，她仍然走下去。就连周末也不惜一切，为自己的理想拼命。

而我呢？

都不知道自己要什么。

生活也许就是这么莫名其妙，时时使人感到茫然。为什么总是有这样或那样的安排，这样或那样的经历，这样或那样的结局？生命总是在不经意间让我们去感受，人生也总是在不经意间写成。。。

真希望现在有个人能为我指引方向。

UPDATE

OK, sitting comfortably at Renena blogging all the outdated updates…Be prepared as it’s gona be a long post.

Last week of work was more food and more food. My editor treat me to a super expensive Japanese BBQ meal which cost $120 for 2 persons.


Oh mine…I nearly fainted. Then went to Muthu Curry with Mee Hong, Edwin and Adeline to eat the yummy fish head curry.



And gona meet up with Xiao Hui soon for our lunch cum pedicure session.

Only took 3 photos on the last day as my table was in horrible mess and I need to get rid of all the things in one day.

Xiao Hui and ME!

Corrine and ME!

Siti, Hajar and ME!

Cant bear to go actually. But I think I need a break after 1 year there. Thanks for everyone for the wonderful internship experience. Everyone.

Though my official last day was Friday, I still got up early the next day to help out in SXW carnival at Bishan. It was tiring and sweaty but fun!

Nice backdrop isn’t it?

Then dinner was with family at porridge steamboat in AMK, it was also a father's day celebration with my grandfather.

Dinner with my parents the very next day was as usual, not a nice topic of discussion here.

Birthday Celebration for 2 Aunty was next! She took leave to prepare her own birthday treat! Shall i call her individualistic? haha

She wants Coffee Cake -_-
Highlight: Black Pepper Crab

And I FINALLY bought a NEW BAG! Happy!

I bought a top from Xiao Hui, she asked me take a photo with it. It was damn difficult to take something stylo. The first pic is taken by I, ME, MYSELF, using timer, at home, with the electric fan. i know it looks kinda hilarious with the fan. Hey, but u gotta admit it's cool ok!

Ok, subsequent shots are done by Chris. I MUST GIVE CREDITS TO HER LA! She was like taking so many shots, and at the end of it telling me:"Now I know the difficulties photographer faced to get a good angle." WTH right! -slaps- ANYWAYS, becoz she work so hard, so i will post more photos to make her happy. haha, but its hard to choose nice ones. OK LA, I ADMIT IM NOT A GOOD MODEL! HAHA, here u go:

Anways, for those interested, please visit http://xquisitelyu.blogspot.com
Say recommended by me, she will give u discount.

DJ COURSE ended with a blast! Thanks to liang peng lao shi and jie ling lao shi for their guidance! The class has 44 students and gosh, all from u noe hur...-non-locals-majority-脱颖而出简直不容易啊！~

SPOT ME!

Decided to prepare dinner for my family before my malaysia trip. but it was very rush as i ended tuition at 330pm. then rushed to supermarket to buy ingredients. (and i haven't decided what to cook). Reached home at 5 plus and started preparing, thanks to grandaddy who helped mi out. dinner was finally served at 730pm, 1.5 hour later than the original time.

Frankly i think one of them looks gross. -_-

22-23 June 2008: Malaysia Trip with SXW Editorial Team
Thanks to my editor who allowed to go for this trip even though i was no longer part of them. And even allow a partner to go with mi. I m sure Lishan ate till she feel like vomitting. haha.

It was really a relaxing retreat. I consider it as a reward for my hard work. Sometimes, if one were to think too much for the reason behind these kind of vacation, its gona be complicated. Editor's hubby really drove like no government, with a amazing speed of 160km/h on average. It was 惊人 in the beginning, but we got used to it and the fast and smooth ride made all of us sleepy. Poor Uncle Albert, he was facing the storm alone, while all of us knocked out!

Tasting place was somewhere in Msia, bear with me cuz im bad with names. (Die, if they were to sell mi to a ulu part of Msia, i bet i will die there!) Let the photos do the talking!

Of cuz it was yummy, OBVIOUSLY. -_- with Buddha Jump Over the Wall as the highlight and other interesting dishes such as dong po meat(above). Well, i shan't elaborate, for details, please read the upcoming issue of SE XIANG WEI.

The chef owner is very good with food carving...look at these cute lil' pandas!

Then we drove a few hours more to SRI BINTANG...to Nourish tech Chinese Medical Centre, where they provide holistic services. it is seperated into 3 centres: 生活雅方、养正、红曲馆。

i had the privilege to try out their 推拿 at 生活雅方. They carry out 精心舞蹈 in the morning which is believe to improve the overall wellness of ur body. No wonder the lady in charge looks so young! haha

Their 推拿.. the only think i can say was, P-A-I-N-F-U-L. The lady merely uses her 'qi' to add pressure to some of the accupunture points, paying attention to my slanted backbone. ouch! but i felt better after it. Or rather, the rest say i look 容光焕发 after it.

Then we went to 养正 to try their accupuncture. it was interesting as the sinseh has invented his way to using pendulum accupunture to 打通身体的气.

Dinner was at 红曲馆 where we were served healthy but yummy meals, for example:

SALAD!

Sinseh said i 气弱, wanted to give mi some herbs and medicine to eat, but i rejected politely. instead got some of their boil soup packets home. i used my 'saved money' to night market nearby and bought a pair of fake ADIDAS shoes in less than 20 mins! How amazing women are right! haha..it was RM 48!

it has got mickey mouse prints! so cute!

Then we drove another few more hours to somewhere near genting...to a bangalow...which is also opened by Nourish tech Chinese Medical Centre. Machiam like chalet or camping like that...anyway, this is where they called 森林疗法 and we did some basic healing techniques in the middle of the night. it was a really nice place for meditation and all...but i have not get accumstomed to be friends with insects as yet. -_-

visted another nice place the next morning, with this friendly dog called xiao huang. but well again...i m scared of dogs...haha

Then drove to satay club to have satay before we head back to singapore. on the way, i bought some food and DURIAN back! slurps!

Ok yes! finish updating!

She is simply amazing!

DJ Course

As some of you have known, I have signed up for a DJ Course organized by FM95.8. It started from yesterday and will end on next Wednesday. It will be a tiring week for me again cuz I have to rush to attend the lesson after work. The class starts from 7.30pm to 10.30pm.

There is 44 students in the class, ranging from 18 years old to 50 years old. Majority of the students, I would say, are all speaking like they come from China! And there is this ongoing pressure that: Hey, you shouldn’t be in this class if you can’t even speak proper Mandarin!

I sat with the youngest in the class, the 18 year old girl, who is taking her A Levels this year. She speaks perfectly, and I thought she is from China or Taiwan. BUT SHE IS LOCAL! And she is a DJ in Singapore Hokkien Association, participated in a lot of DJ competitions, a FM95.8 DJ found her and invited her to work in FM95.8.

I met a teacher who dresses like she is going Ge-Tai, with mini skirt and blink blink clothes. She speaks with a Taiwanese accent.

I met a Language School instructor who comes from China. She reads well and fast. And while other students are reading, she will like to read along loudly to compete.

I met another PRC man who has a perfect voice.

These people are all carrying a dream of becoming a DJ. Some of them seems like they are coming for Superstar competition, heavily make up, pretty clothes. Everyone tries to speak proper Mandarin.

And me, wearing a T-shirt and a pair of jeans, putting on spectacles, carrying a Converse bag, seems like the most sloppishly dressed person there.

After yesterday, I didn’t feel like going anymore.

STRESS.STRESS.STRESS.STRESS.STRESS.STRESS.STRESS.STRESS.STRESS.

Everyone is trying to 脱颖而出. And damn my running nose, I speak weirdly, and my 绕口令speaks so slowly, with so many dunno-how-to-read words.

Well, just take it as an experience bah. SAY BYE BYE TO MY DJ DREAM!

I can’t be a film maker, I can’t be a DJ, I can’t be a writer, I can’t be a scipt writer.

I CAN’T BE ANYTHING!

Then I dunnoe why am I studying this course. -_-

Perhaps, I just have to sit beside the Director and be the Assistant Producer by holding 2 time watches.

Or perhaps, I just have to go back to a hotel and be a receptionist.

Oh wells…

Blackforest GIG

It was Dumpling Wrapping Day last Saturday! Everyone got up very early to help out. Then I went for my piano lesson. Supposed to have tuition after that but the student cancelled it last minute. Great, I can head home immediately.

You cannot imagine how many dumplings I ate that day. Unlike the dumplings in the market, we used charcoal to boil them one bundle by one bundle, so it is really time consuming. For the whole day, I ate 4 small ones, and 3 big ones. Oh mine, I think I can break another record apart from the lovely pineapple tarts. The whole thing ended at 9pm and we were all drained. I think I dreamt of dumplings running after me that night. -_-

On Sunday, went for tuition at 9.30am as usual. But was really tired coz I have been mapling late the past few nights. Haha. I bought dumplings for Chris and Eve and Eve also bought dumplings for us! How sweet!

Cancelled my afternoon tuitions as I had to rush down to Timbre @ Substation to watch Blackforest Gig. AIYO! The taxi uncle doesn’t know where the place was, even though I told him it so many directions. In the end, I volunteered to help him check it out in the directory. But he still lost his way. So we toured Fort Canning like 4 times….

I called Shuli and Mel for help, and Mel was in the taxi too. Apparently, a lot of taxi uncles doesn’t know where is timbre @ substation. During my 3rd round of touring the Fort Canning, I saw Mel and Zhentong, so I picked them up and toured the Fort Canning for the 4th time. The taxi uncle was damn kind la, he stopped the meter, asked me to pay $10 only and he will help us find the correct place.

And finally, we found it! It was already 1.15pm. -_-

So managed to hear the last 15 minutes of the Shigong’s gig. It was my 1st time hearing the blackforest band perform. Now I know why Eugene and Shuli are their NUMBER ONE fanz. 

Went KTV in Chinatown after that. Sing Sing Sing till 6pm and I left to meet the CS girls for dinner. Dinner was at Sun with Moon at Wheelock, they had a new Kyushu promotional menu which was not bad, to me.

That basically ended my day.

I cancelled tonight’s lesson cuz I had a very bad cold since last Sunday and my nose has been running away consistently. TAHAN TAHAN TAHAN for 1 more week and I will have a long long break!

Anyways, we posted an ad. If you receive a booklet by ur doorstep, check us out!